Clouded Emotions

It was a bright and sunny day as I went on a Visit with two of my friends to one of the female hostels to see a colleague of ours. It was a visit that was already planned as she “Pearl” already accused us of not coming to see her since we all gained admission into the same university. I went with thoughts of just staying for a few minutes before taking my leave as I wasn’t the hostel kind of guy and I already warned my friends on the time-frame of our stay. We got to the room, surprisingly, it was an atmosphere full of ladies and being a shy guy, I greeted everybody without looking straight Into anybody’s eye.

Our proposed plan of not staying too long got spoilt as Pearl and my friends got into a controversial discussion and I had no option but to interfere. We chatted for hours and it was fun for us, Pearl and her roommates.

Fortunately, I got to know a lady named Kimberly who was also Pearl’s roommate but wasn’t so active in the discussion though she was cool. We left the hostel at exactly 7:30pm, as we exchanged pleasantries I got to shake Kimberly’s hand and at that moment a bit of shivers ran through my spine.

Oh!!!! I forgot to tell you my name. My name is Seth and this story is about my first love.

Falling in love was the last thing I was thinking of and I never saw it coming. I chatted with Pearl when I got home that night and she was glad we came to see her.

She spoke to me about her friend Kimberly, I was like I didn’t mean anything and I didn’t see anything happening between us but Pearl said she noticed Kimberly staring at me when I was at her hostel. I just rebuffed such claims, although, I felt Pearl was a bit right because within me that the hand shake sent some neuro-signals into my brain. I asked for her contact from Pearl and she “Kimberly” was on my blackberry messenger list in a couple of minutes. What an amazing beginning of the love life I never
anticipated.

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Things were complicated at first but everything changed as we grew as friends. But there was a problem. Kimberly was a 200L student while I was just in my 1 OOL when it all started. We both saw this as a border line but didn’t let it affect the way we
chatted and spoke on phone. Our semester holiday came but distance couldn’t even stand in the way of our growing feelings.

Then it so happened that we didn’t communicate on phone for two days. Next, I got a call from Kimberly but she sounded sober. Oh! My heart was troubled!!! I needed to know what was wrong with her. I tried asking what was going on, but all she said was “I’m not fine” with a teary voice. I asked if anybody had died (don’t mind my bad thought), I asked about her siblings and she said “they are fine”. I had to wait up till midnight to know what was wrong. When she finally chose to speak out, those words got my heart trembling as I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to jump and shout all at once, but before I could make any decision tears rolled down my cheek as I was completely shocked. She said” **with a trembling voice** “Seth”, I haven’t spoken to you in two days and I can’t just explain how I feel. I haven’t felt like this all my life and I just need you to know that you’re different. Don’t stay far from me again”.

A lot of thoughts popped up in my mind. I asked myself thousands of questions in just ten seconds. Was I dreaming or still awake? I just couldn’t arrive at any conclusion, all I
could say was “okay baby, I won’t”.

Then we finally resumed. I needed to see Kimberly, I knew I had feelings for her but I was scared at first. I was just a 100L student. Would she love me despite our level difference? I took my phone, called her and told her we needed to see. She told me she
was going to be available that evening, so I started preparing myself to know what to say when we met. I told my friend I was going to tell her how I felt about her, I couldn’t hold it any longer and he gave me a bit of courage. I was full of courage as I embarked my journey straight to the hostel.

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I was running and walking all at once. I wanted to get there in time. I was feeling euphoric as I couldn’t wait to hold her hands and tell her how much I love her.
I got to her hostel and I called her that I was around. In a couple of seconds she came out to meet me and she gave me a nice hug then something terrible happened.

Everything I planned saying diffused into thin air and I couldn’t say anything. I starred at her for almost ten minutes, opening and closing my mouth. Words weren’t coming
out. It got to a point where she said “Seth, is this why you brought me here? Say something please”. I finally got over my fears and I said “can we please take a walk”.

She looked at me and was surprised. “Is this why you said you want to see me” she said. I couldn’t say anything, I just said “let’s just take a walk”. She obliged and we started walking side by side, so close that I could feel the heat from her body. My heartbeat was racing at 1 000km/hr. Everything in my head was how to calm myself, re-strategize my plan, re-adjust my vibes and re-launch my attack.

I finally got some confidence, I held her hands as we walked towards the closest building to sit, I looked straight into her eyes for some seconds and before I could say a word, I noticed myself kneeling down right in front of her still holding hands and I just said “Kimberly, I really don’t know what to say now cause I’m in a state I can’t really understand. I so much love you. I know there are thousands of reasons why we shouldn’t be together. I’ve fought my feelings so hard and for so long, but this is where it has brought me, right in front of you kneeling and begging for your love.

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She looked into my eyes, held my hands so tight and told me “all is well”. I knew that answer meant a lot and I was dead scared. I couldn’t let go of her hands. I needed to know she wasn’t upset and before I came out of my thought, she pulled me up and gave me a kiss that lasted for five minutes and I was stunned. I couldn’t turn that wonderful kiss down, I had to kiss her back.

It was a passionate moment that felt everlasting In few seconds. I held her so close to me, I couldn’t let go of her. Our lips met again and that moment I was in another planet. I had Kimberly right in front of me.

This is the feeling poets have talked about. This is that feeling I’ve always wanted. She spoke some soft words Into my ear. She said Seth, I have always loved you.I cherished you right from the moment we got close. I really do love you baby. I love Those words sank into my brain and that moment was undoubtedly my best moment on campus.

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Author: The Real IBK

I'm Kuti Ibukunoluwa, a Blogger , a Social Media Influencer and a Graduate of Federal University of Agriculture, Abeokuta (FUNAAB), Ogun State.

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