Incase you missed the first part CLOUDED EMOTIONS
Finally I had found love. We couldn’t get enough of each other, the calls every minute and the way we talked on phone was so cute that my friends got jealous at some point. What else would I have wanted? I’ve got a pretty queen as bae and it was a great feeling. I was so In love that I really wanted to see her every blessed day. Her hostel soon became like my home. We grew so well and our love knew no bounds. Her friends were surprised she could be so happy with a boy in a lower level. In no time I got to know most of her friends in school and at home. She’s such a beautiful and nice young girl to be with. Life with her was so great that I wanted her for a lifetime. Two months into our relationship. Silly problems popped up. The lady I fell in love with was acting different and she found it so hard to explain before I finally got to know.
Some of her friends were not in support our relationship. They were not comfortable their pretty friend who’s got lots of options chose to date a boy in his 1 OOL.
” Kimberly, you’re too good to get yourself involved in this sort of relationship. Of all guys on campus, you chose to date a boy from a lower level” they said. They weren’t happy about everything and it was hurting her. She tried explaining but they refused to listen. She felt so bad about it. She couldn’t open up to me on that, probably she was trying to protect my pride. Their friendship grew sour as they couldn’t stand seeing their friend dating a year one student. I sensed something was going wrong, I tried knowing what was up but she just wouldn’t talk. She wasn’t the girl I fell in love with anymore. She wasn’t so confident of hanging around me any longer. She gave series of excuses that made me conclude something was totally wrong. I called her and begged to see her and she obliged. I was happy I was going to know what was wrong with our relationship.
We met around 6:30pm and she was sitted beside me but not so close as she used to sit. I looked at her anxiously and asked her what was going on. The answer she gave me was surprising!! She said “Seth, if you’re opportuned to walk beside me at the most populated part on campus called MG, do you have that courage to hold me like your girlfriend? Are you man enough to be in this relationship? I looked into her eyes still surprised about the questions she asked. I said not only would I hold you like my girlfriend, I would climb the cliff at MG and tell the whole school how much I love you.
She looked at me with some sort of doubt and immediately I took her hands and said, can I do that tomorrow to show you that I’m man enough to be your boyfriend. She became so sober that moment, held my hand tightly and said I’m sorry I doubted your love and allowed my friends thoughts get into my head. Before I could say a word, her lips found mine but despite the kiss, I was still disturbed. I needed to know what her friends said about me and what brought the doubt. I haven’t for once thought about cheating or hurting her. I was still disturbed but she spoke softly into my ear and those words brought a bit of soothing relief. I couldn’t let go of her hands but I had to go that night as a disturbed dude who was deeply in love with Kimberly
I got home that night so worried. Despite her soothing words and kiss, I needed to know what went wrong that made her doubt my love. I picked up my phone, dialled her phone number. I just needed to talk about what went wrong. We communicated for over thirty minutes. She told me everything I wanted to know, even if they hurt me. She told me everything her friends said and how our relationship had affected their friendship and how insecure and stupid they made her look like dating a boy from a lower level. I felt so bad that night but I knew we both loved each other and we would go through the storm just to have a happy ending. Little did I know that the storm was going to be greater than our strength.
Things went back to normal and we were cool for weeks but I knew she had lots of reservations towards the relationship. I just couldn’t imagine how life would be without her. I was dead in love with her. My friends got to know what was up with us.
Some tried making me see reasons why it would work, others were like I should let her go. I got confused but there was something my heart was yearning for. My heart only wanted Kimberly, she was everything I wanted. If this is what love was all about, then why did it come my way. Two months ago, I was the happiest dude on earth, now I’m the most confused.
She called someday and requested to see me. We planned our meeting and fixed a time. Got to MG that evening and met her there which was very unusual. She wasn’t looking so good and I as got so close to her, she stood up, hugged me and held my hands so tight. I could sense something was up from her expression. I was calm as I kept on staring at her. She gave a faint smile and held my hands and told me she had some important stuffs to tell me. She said “Seth, I’m glad I got to know you and I’m so happy I fell in love with you. It’s one of the best feeling I’ve ever had. I have thought about us a thousand times and I get to arrive at the same conclusion. I love you and that’s a feeling you shouldn’t doubt. But, everything surrounding us is confusing and I’m such in a confused state right now. Seth, I need a break just because I feel that’s the best thing for me. I need to be sure about my emotions”.
Those words sent responding signals into my head. What was happening to me? I asked a zillion times in just few seconds. It was ike I wasn’t sure of what was happening. In a minute it was like my entire reason for being happy was about to end.
Love was indeed a feeling that could build coffins. I just couldn’t let go of her hands and I was so short of words. Tears got stuck in my eyes, I was lost probably in a space the astronauts haven’t discovered. I kept on starring like a fool. I tried holding back my
tears but before I could say a word, they found their ways streaming down my cheeks like a water fall. She held my hands so tight and kissed me. With tears rolling down her cheeks too, she said “Seth, you are a great guy who deserves a better girl. A girl who knows what she wants not a confused girl like me but don’t ever doubt my love for you. I really loved you.
I just couldn’t say a word. I wanted to tell her she was the best girl for me but those words were stuck and they refused to pop out. All I could do was cry. Right in front of me, everything I’ve always wanted was about to disappear. I felt like holding her so close and tell her how much I want her in my life. I held her hands so tight but she forced her hands off mine saying “I guess this is going to be the last time I would be so close to you. Always know that I loved you but I’m confused and this is a difficult decision for me. Stay safe dear and be good always.”
I wanted to wake up from this horrible moment I saw as a dream but I just wasn’t dreaming. I stood still, helpless and dumb as I watched her leave. I couldn’t do anything. My heart was pounding so loud.. at one moment it sounded like one of Swissbeatz’s instrumentals. My life just became a definition of LOVE and HEARTBREAKS.
I got home a sad guy. Nothing became meaningful anymore. I was like a dead guy who lived in pain for days, weeks, months and years urn-end, trying to get healed from the pain that grieved my heart 4years ago. Yeap!!! 4years and I still live in pain
I write this series with tears in my eyes as love disappeared and went far away from me as I lived HAPPILY NEVER AFTER.